Thursday, March 24, 2011

Things to say (and NOT to say) to a pregnant woman

A couple of days from now marks one month away from my "due date", and apparently a new, yet familiar phase has arrived. The time in my pregnancy where I almost dread appearing in public because of the many unwelcome comments from strangers (and even people that I do know). I realize that many of the comments are made in ignorance - not to intentionally hurt or spoil the fun of my pregnancy and soon-to-arrive precious baby - but they hurt, nonetheless. So, I don't want my dear readers to make these same comments in ignorance. But first, here are some lovely comments that BLESS an expectant mother:
"Congrats on that sweet baby"
"You look beautiful (radiant, etc.)"
"I bet you can't wait to meet that little one"
"Oh, how exciting to be expecting another child!"
"Let me help you with that cart (or lift that child for you, or load your groceries, etc.)"
"Children are such a blessing, aren't they?"

And, of course, the not-so-helpful comments:
"You look like you are about to pop!"
"You must be past your due date."
"You'll never make it to your due date."
"Are you sure you aren't having twins?"
"Your baby is going to be HUGE."
"You're having ANOTHER one"
"Don't you know what causes that?"
"I hope you aren't having ANOTHER boy." (What is it with boys? I think they're great.)
"I was never THAT big/My baby was never that big, etc."
"Wow, she's fat!" (I'm pretty sure that's not nice to say to ANYONE!)

At the end of pregnancy, I always have some days that I come home crying, swearing that I won't leave the house again, because I've just heard one too many comments like these from people. Pregnancy is a blessed, unique, very special time in a woman's life. I enjoy being pregnant! Please don't spoil an expectant mother's fun; think carefully before you say something. Same goes for comments on newborns. I think "mom's " advice about, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" applies very well.

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